For the last eleven years, I've cherished the days when the weather was dark and gloomy and I had all kids around the table. I usually lit candles or the fireplace to make it even more cozy. We would drink hot chocolate and warm our souls with good conversation. Some days we watched movies after the core work was done. We felt free to linger long over a scripture passage during bible reading or read good books aloud in the living room.
I loved the coziness of having them all here, not having to brace the weather at the crack of dawn to go sit in the fluorescent village of a school building.
The first day this week that the weather was less than ideal, I found myself in a little bit of a funk. I watched my son walk into his school in the misting rain and longed for him to get back into the car. I walked into the house and even the school table seemed to long for laughter and bible study. But no one was there but me. It was way too quiet and gloomy. Even lighting a candle didn't help.
I felt like I wanted to crawl back into bed. I even had a good cry. I couldn't motivate myself to do much. And that's not like me. I didn't want to go anywhere or really talk to anyone. Who could really understand? So I wandered around the house. I managed to clean the bathrooms and fold some laundry, all the while feeling like I didn't have much purpose other than that. A pretty good little pity-party was brewing inside of me like a fresh pot of coffee and I was about pour it all over anyone in sight.
It was official, I had the post-homeschooling blues.
To some this might seem crazy. Many moms would relish just a little quiet and some free time. I remember those days. They weren't so long ago that I've forgotten the craziness of having everyone home and just needing ten minutes to go to the bathroom without someone calling after me.
Most days, I enjoy our new life. I have a project list a mile long, and I've only begun to check them off. There's lots to keep me busy. Nevertheless, I still long, at times, for the days of a full house and a kitchen that looks like it vomited up books, and pencils, and papers.
I have a friend who has experience with a major lifestyle change. I sent her a text and asked her if she ever felt the blues from it. Her response was this:
She simply said, "Bless someone! Get away from yourself and minister to another."
Well, that wasn't exactly the empathy I was wanting. Secretly I desired a smidgin of maybe "bless your sweet heart, this must be so hard." But, nope. She gave me the words I needed to hear so much more. Bless someone else! She even included the exclamation point. Her words put the reigns on my pity party and brought it to a grinding halt.
So after a few minutes of processing what this might look like, I set out to do just what she said.
It wasn't much. It didn't take much effort, really.
I called a friend for coffee. We sat a while, talked about a billion things, and encouraged one another. After that I went to the church and worked on an odd job or two in preparation for Judgement House. From there I came home and baked two loaves of banana bread. I trekked those loaves across the street to our new neighbors to introduce myself.
Then, I came home to my still quiet house. But like when the scales fell off the blind man's eyes, I had new sight, new perspective. As a result of thinking of other people besides myself, my day had flown by and it was now minutes away from school let-out.
This world beckons us to think of ourselves, to do what's best for us, and to make ourselves happy. Sadly, we believe those lies and fill our days thinking about our own wishes and needs and desires. When things don't go as we planned or we don't get our way, we cry out about life's unfairness. We wallow in self-pity. And often as a result, we get the blues. We long to crawl in bed and pull the covers high and let the days pass us by.
If we truly want to live a blessed life, we start by getting out of ourselves. We bless others. We think of others. We look for the needs of others above our own. Focusing on others puts a new pair of glasses on the eyes of our heart. Compassion, love, and intentionality are keys to working toward beating the blues.
I challenge you to try it! Bless someone!....with an exclamation point.
Let each of you look not only to his own interest, but also to the interests of others.
Have this in mind among yourselves, which is yours in
Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God
a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant,
being born in the likeness of men. Phil 2:4-7
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